I have finally come to realize the meaning of my quite solitary fall. If you remember this summer I complained in several blogs about how I was not doing anything. And how I
needed to be doing something. I was so used to being up and out and with people, that I could not stand anytime going, as I thought, un-used.
However today I had some "cave-time" as I have deemed time at home, alone with myself. And then later my godmother and I went to walmart. And I had an exceptionaly good time, I listened to the walmart song, found everything exciting, and had a unusually great experience. I decided this was due to the fact I had been online most of the day and had excess energy. And then my thoughts returned to the lines I'd created in my head earlier, what was my cave-time forming me into? Because my cave time is definately shaping me, and I have spent much of it on the internet. I do not want to be shaped by the sites I visit, not that they are bad sites. Just that I would rather be shaped by God. Thusly I need to spend cave-time with God.
In writing this, I have gotten away from what I started out to write, and come a conclusion I already knew along a different path than last time. So I suppose I should take it in this time.
Going back to what I intended to write, I have finally learned the importance of time spent alone. Doing activities alone, and spending time alone with my thoughts. And just general quite time spent listening to the world around me, and of course to God. If I want to enjoy boundless time with friends, I need to enjoy cave-time as well. Even better, cave-time enhances my other-time actvities, because it sharpens my me-ness (er- personality) into a chrisper less others-based substance. Ah the realizations that come after 3 months of rather forced cave-time. I'm glad it has been worth it.
