Saturday, November 17, 2012

New Creation

I am becoming a new person.

I broke through the wall of leaving YouTube comments.
For how much I watch YouTube this is fantastic.
I feel less like a viewer and more like a participant. 
It is freeing. To feel like my comment matters, 
even if no one ever reads it.

I got that internship I mentioned.
The crazy part?
I actually think I can do it.
I'm not one to be confident in my abilities. 
I generally worry that I can't do whatever it is.

But I can do this. and beyond that I want to.
I am willing to try, and to learn to be bold.
Willing to  ask for what I need to do a good job,
and push through the hard stuff. 

And these two situations rub off on how I feel about everything else.

These feelings will fade. In a few months when I'm in the middle of it all,
I'll only feel the struggle.

But. Right now,  It feels good.

It feels good.

Friday, November 16, 2012


I'm growing my hair out.

Not that it isn't already long.
Because it is.

But I have been itching to cut it short.
And debating about whether to go short or super long.

I always have this debate.
So I have decided I'll grow it out till spring.

Haircuts can be such meaningful emotional things. When I feel a new season, or just a need for change;

I cut my hair, or add bangs.

So much is tied to hair for girls, or at least for many girls.

The bible says it is "our glory"

But often it feels more like a wrestling partner.

So here's to loving my hair.

Any hair struggles or horror stories? Let me know in the comments.

A note about titles

Two posts in one evening,

You may notice I changed my title.
I thought up "Penned in Orange" when I was a sophomore in highschool.
Almost everything has changed since then.                                                (I know highschool is actually
 two words, but I consistently
want for it to be one)
In typical form I have kept my commitment to the title these three years.
Tonight however, I was changing the template, and I realized,
the title not longer fits. 

It hasn't for some time. 

I put limited thought into the new one, however I think It'll stick.
If not, I'll change it until I find the next long term title.

Thursday, November 15, 2012

Life is Cereal

I compare myself.
A lot.

TO everyone and anyone.

It makes me feel inadequate, like my life is pointless and worthless. Because other people are doing amazing things and writing amazing things and being amazing. While i remain average, and less than the greatest.

That's what is on my mind at the moment. I want to be incredible, and sometime I think that I am. But mostly not. It isn't really a good thing that I want to be incredible, it makes me feel full of myself and I don't like it.

Anyhow, that's enough of that.

I am almost done with my second to last semester of college.
Then off to job life of some sort.
It all seems to0 misty for my liking at this point.

I had an interview today. For an internship.
I need one for next semester, and I pursued this one almost entirely on my own.
And it looks like I'll get it.

That's pretty cool.

Well, a short post. No deep thoughts. But I enjoy reading about other people's lives.
Perhaps you'll enjoy reading about mine.